Life is funny everyone is always searching for that right balance.
Balance means different things to everybody. I’m a Libra so I’m the Queen of balance!(right?) For some it’s having a beer in both hands. Others it’s finding the right balance between work and play. For mom’s it’s the balance between kids, husband, cleaning, work, relaxing, budgeting.
Balance means so many different things! It’s knowing when you apologize and when to stand your ground. When to give in to the kids when they say “Mom can I please get this?” when you know you’ve probably spoiled your kids way too much. (I tend to give in more often then I should! But, hey! I’m a single parent 80% of the year)
Can a life ever truly be balanced? I don’t think so! I think the scales are always tipping one way or another, you can do your best to try to stay in the middle but it’s like a cartoon that’s teetering back and forth.
With Tristan being gone most of the time balance is hard to come by. It’s something that has come up a lot in our conversations lately!
Since moving back to Ontario for me balance is repairing relationships that either didn’t exist before we moved away or strengthening relationships that I’ve already had. Plus it keeps me busy from focusing on Tristan being gone and the sadness that comes with that at times.
Since moving back:
- My Aunt Karen now does my hair. It’s awesome having a hair dresser in the family. I can get my hair done, the kids get to visit with cousins and I see my Aunt and Uncle more then just once a year, which has been great!
- My relationship with my Mother In Law has been great! We haven’t always been on the best of terms, but she has been an amazing person to count on and she has helped keep me busy so I don’t focus on Tristan being gone so much.
- My grandma: Honestly this woman means the world to me, I’ve gotten to spend so much time with her! My kids get to spend so much time with her. It’s been great! It was really important when we moved back that my kids get to know their grandparents before they passed away.
- Olga – I know I’ve talked about her before, but I’m happy I moved back and I got to spend a lot of time with her before she passed. And we just talked about everything and anything. It’s memories I will cherish.
- Old friends, It’s been nice catching up with old friends. I had Alexis here on the weekend with her kids, we were supposed to watch Christmas movies. but it was more like a teenage slumber party where the movie was on in the background, but her and I and the older kids just sat and talked and gossiped and made popcorn! It was perfect!
- Sister In Laws – Relationships that in the past were rocky now seem to be in a good place. It’s actually nice, Other relationship are a bit strained but I think in family it’s normal at times to not have everyone on good terms all the time.
- Tristan – Our marriage balance I’m sure has been the hardest! Or I’m sure it would be for most people. It seems to come naturally now (but we’ve been doing it almost a year) for me it’s pausing the TV so I don’t miss anything I’m watching and I can give him my full attention. It’s making sure when he’s home, I put the electronics down and spend time with him. It’s keeping quiet about how much money I’ve spent (Haha we have a don’t ask, don’t tell policy! I always tell him as long as the bills are paid and money is in the savings account he has nothing to worry about)
I have neglected some relationships more because I’m avoiding the dreaded gossip. But I think with those family members it becomes a “don’t tell if you don’t want people to know” and “stick to safe topics”
My balanced diet came up in conversation today too. It went a little like this:
- Me: I crave mandarins! I eat like 10 a day! or more!
- Tristan: Look at you eating all healthy! You are going to loose so much weight before I get home
- Me: Ya…. No! I balance out the mandarins with chocolate covered pretzels….
And that right there is my perfect idea of balance 🙂